Thursday, June 24, 2010

It's Not Just Gas and/or Water Retention

According to the Wii Fit I gained 7.3lb in 64 days.

 I know this may not be a big deal for some but for me it's is because I feel uncomfortable.  We're not talking about 7.3lbs of muscle I gained.....noooo.  It's called 7.3lbs of now living in camp and quitting smoking fat.  Now I'm sure there are some that are aware of camp life but for those of you who don't, I will try to explain.
 "Jiggs Dinner."  Look it's a salty-stroke-inducing East Coast/Newfie Thing. They serve it once a week here.

The camp on site here is a 2500 man + camp.  Most residents there are men...very large men with big appetites. You can well imagine it requires a massive kitchen staff and plenty of hard work to feed that many people every day.   I checked the menu online today, mostly because I'm picky, and this is our selection this fine evening:

Split Pea& Vegetables

Beef Pot Roast with Carrots, Turnips & Onions

Crispy Chicken Balls

Western Sandwich

Asian Beef & Greens

Rice Risotto with Mushroom

Mashed Potato

Roasted Potato

Oriental Mix

Whole Green Beans

Albian Diner
Cheese Burgers

Potato Skin's

French Fries/Gravy 

Well seems to look pretty healthy, mind the obvious, doesn't it?  Well you really have to be picky if watching your weight as there is high fat and sodium in many things.  Especially salt.  The pre-made sandwiches for lunch are a big violator in camps.   

KFC Double Down Original Recipe  Monstrosity Sodium Content : 1380mg.  

Look at that sonofabitchofagreasegutbomb. Only 540 Calories ladies!

A Turkey and Cheese Wrap from Manfriends camp Sodium Content: 1330mg.

I couldn't even find a picture for a wrap that looks like these things.  All the pictures I came across had those nasty veggies in it like lettuce and tomato.  Granted these are for lunches and have to make it through a day (or several) and veggie fillings go all slimy but that much sodium for some meat,cheese, wrap and mustard. Just pass me the salt lick? k thx bai.

Steak day at Manfriend's camp lists Onion Rings as one of the vegetables for the evening.  I shit you not. 

Caution: May contain itty bitty piece of vegetable.

So with the food, quitting smoking, and my love of eating...guess what time it is kiddies??

I don't particularly like going to the gym. I tend to feel like this:

However, I don't have an athletic cell in by body so I have to go to the gym.  

Even going to the gym makes Brittany cry.  Well we've seen how that's working out for her. FINE. I will go to the Gym and LIKE EVERY SINGLE SWEATY SECOND OF IT.   (Seriously though..Brittany has Rita MacNeil size buttloads of money and looks like a sloppy piece of trailer trash.  Gimme all your monies Brit-Brit and I will be smokin' fine. RAWR).

I have been dedicated to getting into better shape so I've been doing yoga just about every day.  Yoga I just love!  But not this type of yoga:

Or this:


What the hell?!?!?  So much Wrongness. NO ..BAD..NO

As I was saying, I love yoga but just the normal deep breathing, lovely stretching, I can watch ma stories, kind of yoga.  I'm not comfortable going to the gym especially by myself.  So Manfriend is going with me and yesterday was our first time.  All I really want to concentrate at this time is the cardio at the gym and I'm working on strengthening/yoga in my quarters.  It's been awhile since I used a treadmill but they're usually not too complicated.  You pick a program/time etc..  Not these fucking machines.  *BEEP BEEP BEEP* everytime I tried to select something and it won't GO.  Manfriend is next to me on the rowing machine and me in my frustration ask him as whiney as possible to help me.  He hits random things as well *BEEP BEEP BEEP* and it starts to move!  I'm sure he's thinking...silly tech-tard womanfriend...good thing you are such a lil minx and you can cook.  So with his internal smugness, he heads back to the rowing machine.

The treadmill only went for about 3 minutes then ssssttooopped.  GRRRRness.  So I start beeping the beeps and I can't do it....while reading the warning about reading the instruction manual first. I WOULD IF I COULD bastards. At this point I want to just say fuck it.  I whine over to manfriend, "I can't make it go."  He looks at me then just looks straight ahead again.  Nice.  Now I'm uber pissed thinking Damn you..just GO..I just found out I gained 7.3lbs and you are not making this any easier!! GOOOOO *BEEPBEEPBEEPBEEP*  And it goes! Bitchin'.  I rock.  

So I planned on doing 25 mins on the treadmill since I had done strengthening and yoga for 40 mins before. Manfriend comes up close to the end time...which I had entered *beep* and asked if I was ready to go (Keep in mind he had at least 10 full minutes of workout while I was screwing around with the nemisis of a treadmill).  Told him I was just about there and then I noticed it was going over the time limit I originally entered. Even more GRRRness. I made it go but not the way I wanted it to. Dammit. I give it the stink eye and think, This isn't over. The gloves are off. 


Don't be shy and comment away. All of my family knows of this blog so feel free to be as dirty as you like.