Saturday, October 2, 2010

*Tap*Tap*Tap* You're Where?!

So back tracking to oh I don't know..many many rotations ago...... For those who don't work this type of gig, rotation means the long ass shift where you are away from home.  i.e. 10 days of 10 hr shifts in a row while you stay in camp or a rental unit nearby. 
Oh and this is what the camp, where we are at, looks like in the winter:




It was a long and challenging one as I had just started with this company and there was some high stress points/learning curves without appropriate training leaving me feeling fucking retarded.  To sum it up. 
What's so hard?!? FUCK YOU...It's hard without the detailed and appropriate instruction.  How do you use a computer?  Just turn it on and there you go, you'll know what to do.   Asshats.
So yeah, there was some drinking involved in that rotation.  Not so much, Hey look at me I'm trying to do healthy living and go to the gym regularly. WEEE FUN!  More like.. Get out of my fucking face people, I'm going to go drink that fucking face off in my camp room, eat junk food, and perhaps put out for my man.  It was a memorable time.  


One really awesome thing about this time was that Manfriend started taking my Champix in order to quit smoking. Effin' Boss right?! Helllllz YEAH!


This ingestion of Champix and late nights were what lead up to the single most funniest gawddamn thing I have ever seen Manfriend do. 


There I was passed out  in a deep sleep and I vaguely remember hearing this faint tapping.  I was getting all real pissed like because I thought manfriend was doing something in the other room.
 *side note: Kinda like a livingroom but not really. It's the other room that does not contain a bed. The bathroom is right between the two rooms with the main hallway door right across from the bathroom.
*tap*tap*

grrr

*TaP*TaP*


GrrrRrRr


*TAP*TAP*TAP*TAP

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR


Growling, I called his name out a few times hoping he stop doing whatever the hell it was.  Then I heard in an angry shouting like whisper, "I'm in the Hallway.


This caused me to promptly sit up in bed wondering....what the fuck is going on?? I stared into the darkness for a second, which seemed like an eternity and probably even longer to Manfriend, jumped up and headed to the door.  


I opened the door.


There Manfriend was....in the hallway...NAKED. 

Not even a banana-hammock to cover his bits. (Not that he actually owns one of those.  There's always Christmas!)  He often sleeps in boxers but not that time.

He rushed in and promptly jumped into bed.  There I was still with the door open, my mouth agape.  The thought occurred to me that there was absolutely no bloody way I can even begin to comprehend this situation at 3am in my present state. 

This whole situation was tucked away in my grey matter until I had been awake for 3 hours, had breakfast, tea, working and ready for my first break.


Finally, I walked into Manfriend's office next to mine, and asked, "Ok wait..What..Why..WHAT THE HELL?!"  I was pissing myself laughing.  I just about started to hyperventilate.  Also I had said to his embarrassed face, "See..this is why I blog because MY LIFE and THE PEOPLE IN IT are constant sources of fuckery and entertainment!"  


He claims he took a left when he should've taken a right to get to the bathroom and once he heard the click (doors are key card activated) of the door behind him, he realized he was locked in the hallway.  


In his defense, when he was taking the champix there was a few other night time/sleep walking incidents.


One important detail though...he never went to the bathroom after he returned to the room....dum dum dummmmm




That moment turned a shitty ass rotation into much hilarity and bloggy material. Thanks Honey, you help even when it's not intentional. 






**Disclaimer: It took a lot of begging but Manfriend allowed me to post this story.  Just so you his family members know, I had his permission to post this excruciatingly embarrassing moment of his life to share with the internet.

3 comments:

  1. Well my top-hat off to his courage in allowing you to mention such an embarrassing incident. I don’t know what I’d do if those pictures of me in a Noddy outfit hit the Internet.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you, Manfriend, for giving us this WONDERFUL story!!!! : )

    ReplyDelete
  3. Yeah it's too bad I didn't a picture.
    I was way too confused. Could not compute.

    ReplyDelete

Don't be shy and comment away. All of my family knows of this blog so feel free to be as dirty as you like.